You Want Rules? Leviticus Is The Place To Be

 

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How To Sacrifice

Welcome to Leviticus, which is chock-full of everything you need to know if you want to run a smooth and effective tabernacle, are interested in just how to identify leprosy, and have always wondered how to make sure a semen emission doesn't spoil your day. In this third book of the Old Testament you will also find information about when you need to ask for time off work to celebrate the mandatory festivals, and what to look for on a garment label when shopping at Kohl's. 

    In this episode we will review, in brief, the first seven chapters of Leviticus, which cover the all important subject of how to make good with God by killing animals and making toast.

    But first, I'd like to share a little bonanza that came my way a couple of days ago. Our neighborhood, like so many across the nation and the globe, has a cute little unattended Take a Book, Share a Book Library, where people can put books that no longer fit on their nightstand or bookshelves or in their lifestyle so others might have the opportunity of taking them home and broadening their horizons with reading material they might not otherwise be inclined to spend actual money on. Our little library is often heavy with thrillers and romances and self-help and sixteen page kiddie books, but sometimes a truly remarkable volume makes an appearance, prompting a person to wonder just what happened to make the original owner decide to edit it out of their life. The book pictured above made an appearance a couple of weeks ago and try as I might to resist, when I saw it was still there this Tuesday I just had to tuck it under my arm and bring it home. I mean, how could I resist a Bible that promises Adventure? One that has such fun cover art (we're talking kids in a Jeep and a rolled up treasure map and a tiger, I mean come on!) and one that claims to have been created specifically for "Ages 6-10" by a publishing house called Zonderkidz. I may be well past age ten, but as a novice Bible reader myself this edition was bound to give me some easy to understand insights. Right? 

    Of course there was also the distinct possibility that some of the, shall we say, racier bits we have already discovered and which I am fairly confident we shall come across again and again as we make our way through the Old Testament especially, were bound to be either skipped over or bowdlerized in the extreme in order not to offend young sensibilities. I am happy to report that, so far anyway, I have not found that to be the case. For instance, in Genesis, Chapter Nine, Noah still gets drunk and passes out in his tent sans robe or undies. In Chapter 20 they don't skip over the part where Abraham passes his wife Sarah off as his sister and the local head honcho Abimelech "sent for Sarah and took her." I also cross-checked a couple of "what to do with bodily fluids" rules that are covered a bit later here in Leviticus and by golly, the six to ten year old readers of the NIrV Adventure Bible for Early Readers are going to be well prepared when they have to deal with the inevitable times when they need to counsel older folks on what to do if semen touches a man and a woman whilst they are making love. This is something every first through fourth grader should know and I for one am grateful the information is available to them in easy to understand and adventurous terms.

    Here at Book by Book we will still be using the New Standard Revised Version, but it's nice to know I have a quick and inoffensively child-friendly reference to which I can turn when the need arises.

    Now let us dive into what Leviticus has to tell us about how and what to sacrifice to God, where to distribute the blood, and who gets the fat parts.

    The book opens with God calling Moses and telling him to listen up because he's going to tell him how he likes his burnt offerings. For instance, God wants the animal involved to be "without blemish", so right away I'm picturing the cattle and sheep and goats and turtledoves and pigeons (these are the official sacrificial animals) looking around for razor blades and tattoo parlors in order to dodge the draft, as it were. Good luck to them.

    These opening chapters are broken down by the type and purpose of the offering in question, like Burnt or Grain, or Sin, or something called Well-Being, although once we get into Chapters 6 and 7 the borders get a bit sketchier, so once again we're looking at the fact that a really good editorial intervention would have been welcome, but I suppose we should just accept that things are going to be a bit higgledy-piggledy and enjoy things as they are.

    Chapter One is titled "Burnt Offering", and in it we learn how to kill a male from the herd or the flock. Well, actually that is not the case. What we do learn is a bit about the pre-kill ritual and then what to do with the post-kill bits and pieces and bodily fluids. The author avoids including any useful tips regarding how one should go about the actual act of dispatching the creature in question--which in this first example is a bull--we're simply told it must be brought to the entrance of the tent of meeting (aka tabernacle), a hand must be placed on its head, and once those simple requirements are fulfilled the assassination should proceed. Whether that's done with a sharp object, a blunt instrument, or tickling the beast to death the author doesn't say. We do learn that once the beast is dead access to its blood will be necessary because dashing said blood against all sides of the altar is an unskippable part of the process. Spoiler alert,  this blood dashing is a part of all of the sacrifices that follow here, with the exception of the ones involving grain. Not much blood to be gotten from a sheaf of wheat I suppose, but those do require oil and frankincense, so there's still going to be a bit of cleanup involved afterward.

   After the blood is spattered about in the designated compass points, firewood must be arranged properly on the altar, the various body parts distributed on the wood, with special attention being paid to the head and suet, and the priest is then instructed to "turn the whole into smoke on the altar as a burnt offering, an offering by fire of pleasing odor to the Lord." 

    The instructions for the destruction of a goat or sheep are pretty much the same as for a bull. There is a bit of variation introduced if pigeons or turtledoves are involved, including the "how to" portion when it comes to the method of execution which is missing from the bull, goat and sheep paperwork.

15 The priest shall bring it to the altar and wring off its head 

    After the bird has been beheaded there is the usual pouring of blood around the altar. Once that is accomplished the crop is to be removed and the priest is to "throw it at the east side of the altar, in the place for ashes", after which the wings are spread, the whole thing roasted to a fare thee well, and the result is guaranteed to be a "pleasing odor to the Lord" which is the ultimate goal as God is big into olfactory stimulation. For any of you who are fans, as I am, of the television show "Ghosts" this may bring a nod of recognition.

    Chapter 2 covers the less messy Grain Offerings. The important things here are the ingredients required, which are choice flour, nice quality oil, frankincense, and salt, and the fact that only a portion of it gets burned up to create the pleasing odor while the remainder goes into the pantry for Aaron and Sons to enjoy on their lunch breaks. Oh, and very important is the no leavening rule. God doesn't like yeast or baking powder. Or honey; no honey allowed. Don't know why.

    Side note here. Neither the Burnt nor the Grain Offering instructions indicate exactly what benefit(s) the population can expect from these sacrifices of valuable nutritional resources. I'm guessing it was one of those "We'll give you (meaning God) some of what we have and in return we think you'll make sure we have lots and lots more when we need it." sort of thing, but like I said, it isn't spelled out. Kind of like modern day prosperity preachers don't really spell out any concrete, contractually binding benefits one can expect in return for becoming a sustaining member in their private jet and forty-three room, seventeen car garage personal compound fund.

    Side note number two. As a nomadic people, I'm wondering where the choice flour is coming from. It's not like anything has been mentioned about the wandering Israelites settling down for a few years at a time so they can plant crops, but maybe that's what happened. Or maybe they just stop by Whole Foods as they're circling around the desert, waiting for forty years to elapse.

    Chapter 3 is titled "Offering of Well-Being" and this is where I had to use my five minutes of research time to figure out just what's going on here. Actually, it only took a minute or so to find a nice article by Rabbi Andrea Goldstein where she explains things thusly,

"The offerer brings a gift, yet asks nothing of God in return, motivated only by what Naphtali Herz Weisel calls “an abundance of joy, of gratitude to God.” 

    In other words, when life is good and you want to say thank you to the Creator, what better way than to bring a member of the herd (or flock) to Aaron and Sons so they can dash its blood against the altar?

    The instructions regarding the various body parts and internal organs of the critter are even more detailed than in the Burnt Offering section, but if you want those details you'll need to crack open the book yourself, they make me a bit queasy. I will share that this bit in verse 16 got my attention.

All fat is the Lord's

    Good to know.

    In Chapter 4 we get into the Offerings Made Because You Screwed Up variety, otherwise known as Sin Offerings. A curious thing about these sins is that they must have been done unintentionally. The offerings here will only be effective if you didn't know you were doing something wrong while, or before, you did it. So, if you yelled at your mom and dad, or coveted your neighbor's house, or murdered somebody and you didn't realize until the next morning that maybe you should have made a better choice, Chapter 4 is the place to go. Although it must be noted that a whole lot more space is given over to the process of the sacrifice than the specific sins you can make disappear.

    What kind of animal that needs to be killed depends on who did the sinning.

    Anointed priest?  Kill a bull. See detailed instructions and do not neglect the part about taking "11) the skin, all its flesh, as well as its head, its legs, its entrail, and its dung--12) all the rest of the bull--he shall carry out to a clean placed outside the camp, to the ash heap, and shall burn it on a wood fire; at the ash heap it shall be burned."

    The whole congregation?  Kill a bull. Turn the fat into smoke, it smells good.

    A ruler?  Kill a male goat. Follow all instructions regarding where the blood should go.

    An ordinary person? Kill a female goat. The blood distribution is the same. Also worth noting here is that a female sheep may be substituted if such is more convenient than the goat.

    

    In all cases the Tabernacle janitorial team is going to be pulling some overtime cleaning up around the altar and let's not forget that the fat belongs to God.

    A variety of sins is covered in Chapter 5, including failure to testify if you have knowledge of what happened, touching unclean things, or uttering "aloud a rash oath", and in all of these cases you can make it all better by bringing a goat or sheep to the tabernacle to have its blood dashed against the altar. If a goat or sheep happens to be too pricey you can substitute two turtledoves or pigeons, and if that doesn't fit the family budget one tenth of an ephah of choice flour (mixed with a bit of oil and frankincense) will do the trick.

    Nice to know the sliding scale gets some recognition here.

    Verse 14 shifts gears a bit and talks about "the holy things of the Lord" by which I'm guessing is meant the Ten Commandments, but don't hold me to that. Anyway, if your offense fits this category the animal required is a ram, and mention is made of money being part of what's required, with no sliding scale in sight. Although I can't say as I quite understand what "convertible into silver by the sanctuary shekel" means.

    On to Chapter 6, in which we learn that if you commit fraud or participate in a robbery, or find something that doesn't belong to you and you don't return it to its rightful owner, you really ought to not only make it good, but add twenty percent for the other person's troubles.

    Also, a ram needs to be killed.

    Chapter 6 also mentions what the priests are supposed to wear, and not wear, while performing these admittedly messy tasks. Nothing about PPE, which is curious.

    We wrap up this section with Chapter 7 and Guilt Offerings. And yes, I had to Google it to see what the difference is between Sin and Guilt because it doesn't say here in the Book With All the Answers to Everything. Here is what I learned:

    I learned that nobody seems to really know and they generally use as their excuse the fact that "Things Were Different Then." The closest I could find to any sort of clearcut answer came from Google's AI, which tells us a guilt offering is required for the following...

•  Forgetting or making a mistake when fulfilling a vow
• Accidentally eating food reserved for the priests

    So if you sneak a bit of pita out of Aaron and Sons breadbox, you'd better be prepared to haul your favorite goat into the tabernacle to be turned into a pleasing odor.

    * The back cover of the NIrV Adventure Bible for Early Readers promises to take its readers "on a fun, exciting journey through God's Word. Along the way you'll meet all types of people, see all sorts of places, and learn all kinds of things about the Bible."

    Which is pretty much what I'm trying to do here in my own humble way.

    

    

    

 

Loud, Arrogant Christians

Freedom to Worship Very Loudly

We just got back from a lovely road trip to the Denver area to visit with some friends and family. As I have never been a long haul driver, we broke the drive up into two stages, stopping each way at the very nice Inn of the Governors in Santa Fe. On the return trip we arrived in Santa Fe mid-afternoon with plenty of time to take a nice stroll before dinner. My idea was to check out the handy map of the area and find a place of interest or two before we picked a direction to point our feet. I mentioned this plan to my wife and she nodded and said, "I hear music. Let's see where it's coming from."

    Naturally, her plan was much better than mine.

    Following the music turned out to be a bit more a challenge than we anticipated, as the heavy beat and as yet unintelligible vocals seemed to bounce off the buildings in the area of the state capitol complex in a bewilderingly deceptive manner, making it seem like it was coming from first one direction and then, when you turned another corner, from yet another point of the compass. But finally we figured it out and as the lyrics became clearer and the beat became more window rattling we made our way to the source. About half a block away we could make out these words...

Our god is an awesome god!

    ...repeated over and over again. There may have been some other lyrics sprinkled in here and there, periodically spacing out the declaration of awesomeness, but for the most part it was that one line, pounding away at the unoffending Santa Fe air, sounding for all the world more like an angry challenge than a joyous celebration. As we came around the final corner we saw a gathering of perhaps a couple hundred people (I'm not adept at crowd count estimates, but I think I'm being generous) facing a temporary stage on which a band consisting of an electric guitar player, bass player, drummer, young woman singer, and the fellow pictured above, was producing this very loud, musically simplistic brou-ha-ha.

    My beloved decided not to draw too near, but I had to see if I could get a better look at those responsible. First thing that caught my eye was a big truck parked to the side of the stage.

    Ah! So it was America's Revival we had happened upon. Lovely. And they travel under the name of "Let Us Worship." This, of course, made me wonder just who or what was keeping them from that activity. All the evidence indicated they were not only worshiping but doing a pretty good job of disturbing the peace within a six or seven block radius in the bargain.

    And then the fellow pictured above, who whose parents gave him the name John Christopher Feucht but whose stage name is Sean Feucht*, began to tell a story of when he was out elk hunting with a couple of Native American friends. According to Sean, after they had bagged a majestic creature of the forest, as his friends were performing their ancient ritual to celebrate a successful hunt, he turned them away from what he called "misguided worship" by saying,

    

    "Hey, how about we don't lay hands on the dead animal and talk to the dead animal and all that stuff. That's weird. How 'bout we do this? How 'bout we gather together and hold hands? And how about we invite God's presence? And I kid you not, I started to do this. And the presence of God felt so strong both of these big, manly elk guys (yes, that's what he called them) started weeping."

    He continued with, "This is a state (referring to New Mexico as far as I could tell) created for worship. The problem is so much of it is misguided."

    And so here was this combination Elmer Gantry**/Ted Nugent*** fellow, telling a story in which two grown up Native Americans are brought to tears and converted to his version of Christianity in a matter a seconds by his suggestion "How about we invite God's presence?" Sure, just like random people with tears in their eyes stroll up to Trump and declare they've never known a more decent, compassionate, unjustly persecuted fellow in their whole entire lives. This is just a little less plausible than the burning but vocal bushes that are not consumed or large bodies of water splitting in two we've been studying in our prior installments here at Book by Book. Also, the arrogance in his anecdote is astonishing although it's very much of a pattern with what con artists throughout the ages have done.

    According to this revival huckster, the only folks with a right to worship are the ones who worship like he does, the ones who toss money his way so he can go around the country making noise and insulting people. This, my Dear Reader, is a darned big reason why religion has such a deservedly tarnished reputation.

*If you are of a mind to, do a quick search for this Sean Feucht fellow. I think you'll find that he is an opportunist of the sort America likes produce on a regular basis.

**The movie with Burt Lancaster is excellent, but if you can, read the book by Sinclair Lewis. It is an exposé of hypocrisy that has lost none of its relevance since it was first published in 1927.

***Both of the Dear Readers who have read "devil Went Down to Phoenix" know just how I feel about Ted Nugent. And how our hero Ted Hogwood feels about him too. 

    

A Break

 

Just a quick note to let you know there will be a bit of a pause here at Book by Book while my beloved and I are on a shortish road trip. The photo above is of a bit of Biblical artwork hanging above the toilet in our Santa Fe hotel room. Knowing what I know now I can't help but wonder if the animals are thinking "See, he should have chosen one of us to be his partner."

See you all right back here soon.

Exodus Pt 10

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After a Misunderstanding or Two, 

Life Goes On and 

the Tabernacle Gets Built

A couple-three weeks ago, on a lark, I responded to the messages Google kept sending me about joining their happy family of Ad-Sense bloggers and Making Money with my blog. I'm not doing this as a commercial venture, it's more of an intellectual exercise and long put-off goal I decided to make public, mostly to give me a bit of a nudge whenever I'm inclined to abandon it. But I figured what the heck, let's apply and see what happens. Well, what happened is that the nice Ad-Sense folks determined that "Book by Book" does not have the necessary qualities that would make it a good candidate for advertising. They included some links that are supposed to help point me in the right direction if I want to make the needed corrections, but I don't think I'll be bothering. For one thing I didn't understand a damned thing they were talking about, like "thin content" and "alignment of navigational elements." 

We're going to keep this little venture ad-free.

Did you see what the Louisiana State Legislature and Governor have just done? They went and made it a law that all public school classrooms must have a copy of The Ten Commandments posted on the wall. Not a copy of The Constitution and its Amendments, or The Declaration of Independence, or The Top Ten Shakespearean Insults, but The Ten Commandments. Social media is all abuzz about this, with those in favor saying things like "It's about damn time!" and "What's the fuss? It's just everyday rules for good behavior." and those opposed losing their minds over the complete disregard for what everyone likes to call "Separation of Church and State", which is kinda sorta but not actually referred to in the First Amendment**.

My two cents about the whole thing is that no, The Ten Commandments are not simply everyday rules for good behavior. Just so you don't have to backtrack to find them, here they are again.

1. You shall have no other gods before me.
2. You shall not make for yourself an idol.
3. You shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord.
4. Remember the sabbath day, and keep it holy.
5. Honor your father and mother
6. You shall not murder
7. You shall not commit adultery
8. You shall not steal
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor
10. You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or male or female slave, or ox, or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.

Anyone can see that the first four of them are pretty darned specifically religious in nature. The next five are, I grant you, pretty good guidelines for how to behave but by no means are they comprehensive; for instance there is no "You shall not change lanes without signaling" or "Honor your HOA landscaping guidelines", both of which could go a long way in making this a safer and more attractive world. Number Ten is a bit iffy mostly because it tries to be specific and in doing so it leaves out a whole heck of a lot, like is it okay to covet your neighbor's husband, or the car your neighbor is leasing, or your neighbor's cat, because we all know cats don't belong to anybody.

Back to Exodus. I reviewed the last nine chapters and I think we can reasonably buzz through them all in the time and space we have today.

    Right after we learn that the Covenant between God and the Israelites has been made official by being put down on a couple of stone tablets by the finger of God, we're told in Chapter 32 that those same Israelites had gotten antsy about the fact that Moses seemed to be taking his everlovin' time up on the mountain talking with God. They wanted some action and they wanted a god they could see and touch and admire up close. So they go to Aaron, you know, the fellow who has been picked out to be Head Priest only I guess he doesn't know that yet, and they say, "Come, make gods for us." Really, that's what they said. Aaron didn't need much persuasion, and he didn't need a lot of time to come up with a plan to satisfy the congregation. He had everyone in possession of gold earrings bring them to him and he "cast an image of a calf" and everyone thought it was a more than satisfactory god.

    But the Lord gets wind of what's going on and he tells Moses he is going to "consume" the calf worshipping Israelites and start the nation building all over again with Moses. My guess is that Moses isn't too interested in raising a whole new extended family at his age, because he implores God to reconsider. He reminds God about the promises he made to Abraham, Isaac, and Israel (Jacob), and wouldn't you know it, 14) "And the Lord changed his mind about the disaster that he planned to bring on his people."

    Happy to have saved his people from Consumption by God, Moses takes the tablets down the mountain. As he and trusty Joshua get close to the base, Joshua makes a comment about what he hears coming from the encampment, which he thinks is a noise of war. But Moses knows it is the sound of revelry, and when they turn the corner and see the people dancing around the golden calf he loses it. He throws the tablets on the ground, busting them all to bits, then he takes the calf, melts it down, grinds it up, and puts the powder in water and makes everyone drink it. Must have been a big calf and a reservoir of water as, once again, I would remind us that we're talking about several hundred thousand people here.

    And he's not finished. He gathers a bunch of Levites who, now anyway, are claiming to be "on the Lord's side", and tells them to grab their swords and go kill "your brother, your friend, and your neighbor", because a sharp clap of his hands and a stern look don't seem to be quieting the crowd. Three thousand dead Israelites later he thanks the Levites for their service and tells them they have brought a blessing on themselves.

    The next day, Moses asks God to forgive the people, but instead God says anyone who sinned against him will be blotted out of his book and they can look forward to an unspecified punishment at some later date. 

    And then he sends a plague. We are not told what form the plague takes, how many people die, just that he sent a plague because the people asked Aaron to make a calf and he did.

    Let's pick up the pace.

    In Chapter 33 God once again repeats his promise to drive the Canaanites, et al out of the Land of Milk and Honey. He also calls the Israelites "a stiff necked people."

    Moses sets up his tent outside camp so he can talk with God without being bothered by the stiff neck rabble.

    God tells Moses he doesn't want anyone to see his face, so whenever they meet from here on out Moses will need to stand in the cleft of a rock, let God put his hand over Moses' eyes as he passes, and not see anything until God has passed and all that is visible is God's backside.

    Chapter 34 solves the broken tablets issue when Moses fashions a couple of new stones ready to be taken to the printer.

    God promises to hold a grudge by 7) "visiting the iniquity of the parents upon the children and the children's children, to the third and fourth generation."

    In a section titled "The Covenant Renewed" God brags about how he is going to "perform marvels" and how "it is an awesome thing that I will do for you." He also confides that one of his names is Jealous.

    In verse 26 we are reminded not to boil a kid in its mother's milk.

    Moses spends another 40 days and 40 nights with God and ends up writing everything down on the tablets himself, supposedly because God wasn't showing any inclination to do a repeat performance of the finger writing.

    Moses goes back to the people and everyone comments on his "Been With God" shiny face. He buys a veil.

    We get a quick reminder not to work on the sabbath at the beginning of Chapter 35. The penalty is still death.

    Moses puts out the call for the materials needed to build the tabernacle and related accessories. He also informs Bezalel that he has the winning bid to be general contractor and that he needs to bring Oholiab on board as his top assistant in charge of engraving, design, and embroidery.

    In Chapter 36 the tabernacle is made. Everything God specified is once again spelled out. In detail. In over thirty-one verses.

    Bezalel is super busy in Chapter 37 making the Ark, the Table, the Lampstand, the Altar of Incense, and the Anointing Oil and Incense.

    The following chapter, number 38, is devoted to assuring us that the Altar of Burnt Offerings and the Court of the Tabernacle were completed in a satisfactory manner. It also provides us with an accounting of just how much the entire project cost.

• Gold: Twenty-nine talents and seven hundred thirty shekels
• Silver: One hundred talents and one thousand seven hundred seventy-five shekels
• There is a lot more, breaking it down by what was used for the pillars, hooks, bases, utensils and other items. You can look it up in Chapter 38, verses 27-31.

    They perform a census of the men over twenty years of age and the count is six hundred three thousand, five hundred fifty, or about eighty four thousand more than my home town of Mesa, Arizona. Figure in the women and children and we're talking, what do you think, somewhere around two million?

    The vestments for Aaron and Sons get sewn and embellished with lots of pretty gemstones in Chapter 39. The last part of the chapter gives us a recap and tells us that Moses likes what he sees.

    In the final chapter of Exodus God gives Moses instructions on how to organize all of the pieces and we learn that all of this is coming together on the first day of the first month of the second year of their Egypt to Milk and Honey Adventure. Only thirty-eight years and eleven months to go!

    They will be proceeding only on the days when the Cloud of God is not hovering around the Tabernacle. If the cloud is there (at night it will be fire) they're staying put.

    Next up: Leviticus. I can't wait.

*A pretty Northern Cardinal of the Non-Catholic variety.

**Amendment One: Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

    

    

    

 

Exodus Pt 9

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Get Out The Graph Paper, Pencils, 

Sewing Kit and 

Tool Chest

Does anyone remember a song by Desmond Dekker and The Aces from the late sixties called "The Israelites"? There is a radio station at 95.1 FM that calls itself The Wow Factor and they mostly play songs from the 60's and 70's, and the other day "The Israelites" popped up on the car radio as my beloved and I were toddling around town. Catchy tune with a syncopated reggae beat. Hadn't heard it in decades and I just thought it was interesting since I've been spending a whole lot of time lately with the Original Israelites, or the OI's as I like to call them. Outside of the repeated refrain of "The Israelites!" I couldn't understand the lyrics very well, probably due to a combination of hearing loss I prefer to deny exists when my wife suggests perhaps I should visit an audiologist and invest in a set of hearing aids, and Desmond Dekker's Jamaican accent but I think I'll just blame it on poor audio engineering. I did use about thirty seconds of my five minutes of research time to find out that, according to Wikipedia anyway, the title/refrain of the song comes from the identification Rastafarians have with the Twelve Tribes of Israel and the troubles both groups have seen. Interesting. I may have to look into that, just not now. We need to move forward with the second book in the Old Testament.

    I have been giving a fair amount of thought to just how to present the remaining chapters here in Exodus. As I said in the installment titled "A Short Note of Despair", we are shifting from story and character mode into Heavy Duty Instructional Mode and honestly I think a whole lot of momentum is lost; we no longer have the page turning "what happens next?" and "what an fascinating if peculiar new character this is" qualities to keep us interested, even with all of the tangents thrown into the mix. And so after trying a couple of more detailed approaches, I think we'll be turning the dial on the Reader's Digest Condensed Knob up to eleven in an effort to share the essentials, give you at least a bit of the flavor, but not put you to sleep like an Ambien with a Chardonnay chaser. If the lack of detail frustrates, I apologize, but remember, you can always crack the cover on your own copy and dive in yourself. I think you'll see what I'm talking about.

    Chapters 25 through 31 are pretty much all about the box God wants Moses to store the tablets with the Rules for Living in, the surroundings in which this box is to be kept, what the Keepers of the Box (Priests) should wear while doing their priestly duties, and what those duties are.

    Chapter 25 begins with God telling Moses to gather up all of the nice construction and ornamentation materials they talked their Egyptian neighbors out of right before they left. If any of the Israelites had been hoping to keep this treasure for themselves, they are in for a rude awakening. God wants to use it to make a bunch of stuff, and he's got the plans all drawn up, ready to go.

    The items God wants for this projects are:

• Acacia wood
• Gold
• Silver
• Bronze
• Blue, purple, and crimson yarn
• Fine linen (no seconds)
• Goats' hair
• Tanned ram skins
• Fine leather (see linen note)
• Lamp oil (good quality)
• spices
• various gemstones

The items to be made from these materials are:

• An ark (wooden box, not a big boat) in which to store the tablets
• Something called a "mercy seat" to be placed on top of the ark. It's got cherubim on it, their wings shadowing the seat at both ends.
• A table
• A lampstand
• A tabernacle
• A curtain
• An altar suitable for burnt offerings
• Hangings
• Vestments for the priests (Aaron and his sons)

The ark, mercy seat, and table, as well as the framework for the tabernacle and the altar are all to be made out of acacia wood. Measurements in cubits are given for each of these items, as well as details--lots of details--like loops and poles on the sides to facilitate moving them and gold overlay to make 'em shine and where the cherubim go.

    Accessories like bowls and flagons and plates and dishes, as well as the lampstand itself are to made out of gold. The yarn and linens are to be used for curtains (cherubim theme) and should be joined together and attached to the acacia wood framework to form the outside of the tabernacle. Other curtains will be inside the tabernacle and will surround the ark. The frames are to rest on silver bases.

    Twisted linen, bronze bases, and hooks of silver are the materials called for to make the court, which I'm guessing is the area just outside the tabernacle proper. Lots of pillars are mentioned. The gate to the court has its own design, involving yarn, twisted linen and silver banded pillars. Pegs and any other miscellaneous utensils for the tabernacle are to be made out of bronze.

    All in all it seems that Moses and his team have quite the construction project in their future. The other thing that struck me was the fact that this all seems to be happening relatively early in the forty years of desert wandering, although at this point I'm not really sure where in the timeline of things this is happening, and I'm left to wonder both about where they are going to do all of this work and how they are going to carry it around with them until they arrive at the Land of Milk and Honey. It's true that the ark and table and whatnot are supposed to have rings on the side and poles that go through the rings and I assume that is so they can be transported, but gee whiz, I'm thinking they're going to be hard pressed to find volunteers for forty years of ark dury. 

    Chapter 28 is all about the "Vestments for the Priesthood", which as we've discussed, means Aaron and his sons. Seems a low priest to parishioner ratio when you look back at the six hundred thousand not including women and children figure tossed out there earlier, but let's not worry about that right now. What's important here is that Aaron and Sons are properly attired, which in this case means a breastpiece, an ephod, a robe, a checkered tunic, a turban, and a sash. Oh, and linen undies. The undies are very important. God makes it clear that failure to wear the designated underwear will result in death and a blot on ones Permanent Record.

    In Chapter 29 we learn all about The Ordination of the Priests, and let me tell you, it makes a fraternity initiation seem like a walk in the park. Of course there are critters to be sliced up, in this case a bull and two rams and they must be "without blemish." Blood figures prominently in the process here, including a generous amount that is to be dabbed on the priests' ears and flung against the sides of the altar. Aaron and Sons get to have quality time with ram fat and entrails and internal organs before they get the Weber Grill out and send a pleasing odor of roasting ram innards up to God. Baskets and bread and oil flung hither and yon and you've got a real, manly good time spelled out here. There is more about daily offerings which are designed to reduce the bull population as well as a similar sort of herd reduction of any lambs they may have in the menagerie.

    A mandatory half shekel offering, and a bronze basin in which the priests are required (upon pain of death, of course) to wash their hands and feet are the featured items in Chapter 30, along with recipes for making high quality anointing oil and an exclusive sort of incense. Surprisingly, there is no death penalty associated with the misuse of either for personal adornment, only banishment, although I suppose that could be a death sentence of a slow variety, considering nobody in that crowd seems to know where they're going and safety in numbers is what is protecting them.

    Just as Moses is beginning to wonder how he is going to get all this work done, in Chapter 31 God tells him to delegate. There are two fellows in the group who are nicely qualified for these projects: Bezalel and Oholiab. God assures Moses that "they shall do just as I have commanded you." So that must have taken a real weight off his shoulders.

    The chapter continues with yet another reminder to Keep the Sabbath. The Death Incentive is mentioned. Twice. Working on the sabbath will kill you. This seems to be something that the vast majority of employers have conveniently disregarded of late.

    We wrap up Chapter 31 and today's little Bible Looksee with verse 18:

When God finished speaking with Moses on Mount Sinai, he gave him the two tablets of the covenant, tablets of stone, written with the finger of God.

    I've never been partial to those screens where you're supposed to sign your name with your fingertip, they skip and often refuse to even recognize your finger is even there, but God being God, he can fingertip it on stone, which is pretty cool. I do have a question here: There was a lot of material covered in the chapters we've been looking at in the last few installments, not just The Ten Commandments. Do the tablets have everything? Instructions on how to make a nice ark? How to sew an ephod? The proper flinging of bull blood?

    Just wondering.

*Strawberry Fields in Central Park

P.S. You may have noticed that I often go back and make a few corrections or amendments to these installments. I hope that doesn't bother you, but I am a constant tinkerer when it comes to words.